I wish that I could state that my thing I do regularly is blog. But I don’t. I seem to do well for a while and then life and it’s activities grab ahold of me and I am not focused on my writing. My tendency is to choose other things. I do so many things on a regular basis, but not write. I need to make it a predisposed part of my day.
I have been so busy attempting to fulfill the requirements of the STRS disability board that my life has been like a ragdoll tossed to the side for near two years now. I just ran out of time with the whole process of getting disability. It seems as if proving ones traumatic brain injury is not easily done. I have been to so many doctors over the course of the last two years and to no avail have not one doctor who was willing to fill out the documentation. I am left with no money; no pay for over two years now and bills from trying everything I could to get what they asked for. I feel as if I wasted thousands of dollars in an effort to get something I was due and lost. I paid into a system that was supposed to be there if I needed it. But, as for me it was not. I now must accept the lower payout of standard retirement. I will not get any money for a while now as the process will take time. I cannot work as I am disabled – just not on paper for STRS. I had lived in a world filled with illusions that the money I had put into the fund was there for me if were ever to need it. But, I have found that to get that money back out is not that easy. I wish I had bought disability insurance prior to my accident. My hope is that I will be able to find a part time job that I can do a few days a week for a few dollars. I am not sure I can work in fluorescent lights at all but I think I would like to try.
Perhaps now I can write a bit each day as the paperwork attempt is over. It filled my life and robbed me of so much. I need to move on. HUGZ